Richard the Third vs Huhne

Ok so my second blog came a little sooner than I'd anticipated. This is nothing more, and certainly nothing less, than a rant.

As a man who loves history and considers himself to be a student of it, I have been particularly excited about the news concerning the bones dug up in Leicester; are they those of the former King of England, Richard the Third. I am passionate about my country, I turn into a rabid maniac during any England international rugby match, and I can go from levels of chemical ecstacy to darkest depression simply on a broken gain line and a knock on. I stand true even amongst the worst of the barracking that England so often gets from just about every other nation on the planet.

So I arose this morning and went straight to the kitchen for breakfast and the usual wake up potion, then settled myself down in front of the news, excitedly waiting for the 10:00am announcement concerning the truth behind the bones. I was watching Sky News, BBC was an option, I didn't think my other favourite news channels, Al Jazeera and RT, would be covering this jaw dropping story. I listened to Murnaghan as he trawled through the news until the moment came; we are now going live to the press conference concerning the bones found under a car park in Leicester..

Oh yes, here we go. They stood up and informed us that they'd be quantifying their research before announcing the news we were all anticipating. They discussed all the different facets that made up the research in order to find the truth of what happened to the much maligned Richard the Third. This is of course standard fare for any academic, and how all research is announced, I was not surprised. But it would seem that Sky News were, and were caught on the hop.

They were getting to the juicy bits and announced "This is a world exclusive photo of the bones.." blatantly going to be the bones in the grave.. never seen before.. a world exclusive photo of the possible bones, in a grave, of the former member of one of our Royal Families, last of the line of the Plantagenets, the former King of England, King Richard the Third..

..then cut to Murnaghan in the news room..

..we interrupt this broadcast for breaking news..

What's happened? Has North Korea invaded South Korea? Has China invaded Taiwan? Have the Iranians started a ground offensive against Israel? What is it that's so important they stopped in the middle of a world exclusive?

Huhne has pleaded guilty to speeding and perverting the course of justice.

You are shitting me?! Or should it be.. no shit Sherlock?

No one in this country, not even Huhne's own son, believed a word of the drivel that issued forth from Huhne's cake hole. Nobody. Not one single person was dumb enough to think he wasn't actually guilty. Of course it was him driving! And the fact he appealed everything for ten years just highlighted the fact that he's a squib and a complete muppet. At best the whole story is a side show, a comedy, possibly a tragic comedy, the kind of story that news programmes deliver right at the end of the show to cheer everyone up. A light hearted piece of news.

"And finally, we leave you with the surprise news that Huhne realised it was in fact him who was driving, and that the entire planet was right. Thank you Huhne for confirming this."

It beggars belief that this absolute non-news item, that has no bearing on anything whatsoever, that no one actually cares about, or was in two minds about, should interrupt possibly one of the greatest mysteries, investigations and research projects of recent years.

This was epic!! Richard the Third is one of the finest examples, nee victims, of propaganda in history. Here is a guy who by accurate accounts was generally liked by those around him and was actually a decent King. The Tudors beat him at the Battle of Bosworth and then proceeded to do a complete job on him. He became an evil, hideously deformed tyrant. Our very own Shakespeare did a complete character assassination on him that has lived with us ever since. If you ever wanted proof on how history has been distorted, about how propaganda has been used successfully since the earliest of times to influence the thoughts and minds of future generations, then this is the king of all examples (no pun intended). Everything from mocking and exaggerating his appearance; he had a curved spine he was not a hunchback with a limp, to making him appear evil by spreading rumours; that he killed the Princes in the Tower. Mocking appearance and spreading lies are methods still used today to bring scorn upon people. They threw so much mud at Richard the Third I'm surprised he wasn't found under Ben Nevis!

So the news interrupted this epic announcement just so it could mock Huhne and give him the kind of credit and coverage he doesn't deserve. He'll leave no footnote in history. But Richard the Third... now he is a legacy of the past. A legacy that we should all know about, and that we should all learn from.

Oh, the bones were announced to be, without any reasonable doubt, to be those of King Richard the Third. May he finally rest in peace.